Tag Archives: Nonverbal Communication

I’ve been so struck by the Parkland theatre students who have been speaking out so forcefully after the tragic shooting at Marjorie Stoneman Douglas High School a few weeks ago. It’s been reported that several of them participate in the theatre program at the school. Besides the obvious techniques such stage presence, there are other, less well-known, but just as powerful takeaways that we, as a nation, have been watching play out on the national stage. Following are a few of them. Take note if you want to break through barriers holding you back and get heard…

1. Show, don’t tell. Performing arts requires the ability to look, move, and sound persuasive. This is the obvious stuff, the physical and vocal delivery of lines. You’re playing a part, often based on a character you have no familiarity with. So when you see these kids looking comfortable vs. stiff (like so many politicians), that’s why.
2. Empowerment. When you do a public performance, you take charge and control the energy of a room. Parents and teachers who have always have the upper hand are relegated to being the ones to sit and pay attention. One of the most interesting outcomes is the “popular” kids, who may have not wanted to have anything to do with those theatre kids, are suddenly attracted to them. The performer recognizes this and internalizes it so it becomes a superpower.
   
3. Manage conflict and tolerate dissent. All dramatic texts contain a conflict that must be resolved one way or another. When student actors study scripts, they learn a variety of ways to argue, debate, and solve the problem..Since not all plays have happy endings, they learn increased tolerance for disagreeable outcomes.
   
4. Teamwork. Just like in sports, when kids put on a show, there is an enormous amount of teamwork involved. Each person’s performance is dependent on others doing theirs right. You don’t want to let your teammates down, so you work hard to hold up your end of the bargain.
5. Strong bonds. You form such strong bonds that when the play’s run ends, there are a lot of tears. This camaraderie remains long after the drama club experience ends.
6. Judgment. One of the most common critiques of theatre training is that it’s subjective, that quality is a matter of opinion. That’s one of the biggest canards out there and a reason so many parents object to their kids participation in arts programs. Among other things (see above), all arts training, including performing arts, teaches how to judge what’s good and what isn’t in the absence of fixed or easy-to-quantify rules and metrics. That’s a huge skill and has real applications for real life, unlike a multiple choice test.

All these benefits accrue to what you are seeing in the Parkland students today. In my own life, it has enabled me to walk into any room, even in the early days when I felt little confidence, and command attention. This skill enabled me to get hired over other, more qualified candidates.

Though you are likely well past high school, it is never too late to learn the skills, put them into practice, and reap the enormous benefits that accompany them.

Whether you agree with them or not, the Parkland theatre students are hard to ignore. They will remain so. Something to learn from.

One of my biggest frustrations with prospective clients is their almost universal stubborn belief that before they put time and resources into becoming masterful speakers and presenters, they have to perfect everything else. Lately, I’ve begun to tell them that’s a mistake, that they’ve got it completely backwards, that speaking and presentation should come first. Here’s why…

• The ability to present oneself with confidence and charisma is incredibly client-attractive. Think about it: When you see someone who is engaging on the platform, chances are you think they are more competent than a competitor who exhibits discomfort and uncertainty, thus are more likely to give that person a chance vs. their competitor. You want to connect with that person, learn more about them, exchange contact info, link in with them, schedule a meeting with them, invite them to speak at your event, refer them to others. Guess what this does for their business and reputation? It would do the same for yours.
• It is an accelerator. You will book more business, whether your business infrastructure is ready or not. The income generated through your speaking will facilitate your investment in the other aspects of your business. And isn’t increasing revenues the goal in any business?
• It’s not subjective. Contrary to popular belief, it is not in the “eye of the beholder.” In fact, there are sound, objective measures experts like me agree on that professionals with a high degree of appeal have in common. We humans are social animals. As such we organize ourselves into groups with leaders, whom we subsequently entrust with our safety and survival. How does that trust get built? Largely via the way leaders communicate.
• It’s a beauty trick. (I love this one.) We are more drawn to people we perceive as attractive and the more charismatic and engaging a speaker is, the more attractive we deem that person to be.
• It is not superficial or fluff. These are not soft skills. They are the skills we must deploy to deliver our message, our authority, our knowledge, our subject matter expertise… to hit our target. They are the skills that make it easier for prospects to make a decision. And isn’t that what serving clients is all about… making everything easier for them?

So the next time you are thinking of polishing up your speaking – or the next time a less-qualified competitor eats your lunch – think about how speaking and presentation should come first. It’s the glue that binds all the others together. And it will make your life easier, too.